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Songseeker
Joined: 19 Apr 2005
Posts: 342
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Funny truths the movies taught us
Please add yours.
Here are some funny movie truths I have learned over the years: 
Medieval surfs all had perfect teeth.
If you have sex, the guy in the hockey mask will surely kill you.
Whenever there's a rash of man-eating animal attacks on a body of water, there will also be a mayor or top official in town who tries to hush it up because they don't want tourism to be affected or because they don't want the big celebration they're planning for their town, usually a holiday party, to be canceled.
If someone is trying to run you down with a car, be sure to run directly in front of the vehicle instead of veering off to the left or right - and safety.
You've shot the homicidal maniac. You've stabbed him. You've thrown acid on him. You've electrocuted him. Nothing kills him. By all means, after your next attempt to kill him go and stand directly over him when he's laying on the ground to make sure he's really dead. Then he can really get a good grip on your ankle and you can be shocked and scream.
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Wed Apr 27, 2005 5:22 pm |
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cinemaKid
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 1819
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If you're a poor struggling young woman, you're destined to meet a handsome business man with a couple of billion dollars in bank.
If you're a poor struggling young man, you're destined to meet a beautiful young woman and she'll do anything for you to achieve whatever you're trying to accomplish.
*** sarcasm *** This is so real ... *** sarcasm ***
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Wed Apr 27, 2005 10:54 pm |
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Songseeker
Joined: 19 Apr 2005
Posts: 342
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quote:
If you're a poor struggling young man, you're destined to meet a beautiful young woman and she'll do anything for you to achieve whatever you're trying to accomplish.
But instead of being in love with her, you'll be in love with the beautiful, unattainable woman who will be in love with someone else.
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Thu Apr 28, 2005 1:50 am |
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cinemaKid
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 1819
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A couple of other unorigial story lines:
If you happen to drop your notebook computer, it will end up being placed in the middle of the street magically. Magically, the car will run over it and destroy the computer in approximately 3 seconds.
If you're carrying a cap of coffee, you run into someone and the coffee magically ruins his/her entire clothes. Also you have 80% chance of meeting love of your life this way.
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Thu Apr 28, 2005 2:12 am |
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Songseeker
Joined: 19 Apr 2005
Posts: 342
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More movie cliches:
All car accidents end with an explosive ball of fire.
When an especially grisly serial killer is on the loose, always make sure to get the alcoholic detective with PTSD out of retirement. This is the only way he will ever come to terms with the fact that a similar serial killer murdered his wife and kids several years previously.
Female detectives will always chase down bad guys in high heels.
When running from a homicidal maniac, make sure to trip and fall during the chase. This is essential before getting to your car and not being able to start your engine.
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Sat Apr 30, 2005 7:03 pm |
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cinemaKid
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 1819
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quote:
Originally posted by Songseeker:
They also haven't figured out women don't wake up in the morning with a perfect hair and makeup.
Ah, women in Hollywood have too much plastic under their skin so that they do wake up with perfect look. Ok, this was a bit harsh comment.
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Sun May 01, 2005 5:10 am |
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Soliloquy
Joined: 01 Jul 2007
Posts: 566
Location: New York |
Never turn your back on a dead bad guy after you've killed him. He'll come back to life and attack you with an axe.
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Fri Feb 08, 2008 6:12 am |
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